In my youth The Sound of Music was one of my all time favourite films. I watched it over and over again and memorized the songs and most of the words which I can still recall in my memory bank today.
One line that Fräulein Maria says to the Von Trap children that has always stuck with me was; “When God closes a door, somewhere he opens a window”. I have always remembered this, and find it so sweetly lodged in my subconscious mind revealing itself to me in my times of need.
But the reality is that so often in life we solely focus on that door closing in front of us feeling the immediate emotional shakeup that coincides alongside it. That sometimes ‘slammed’ door may be shocking, unexpected, hurtful and painful. It may come in the form of a lost job, a breakup, changed plans, missing out on a promotion, an illness, or betrayal from a friend; just to name a few. Life doesn’t always flow the way we expect it too and when these ‘doors close’ in front of us, it is potentially a hard and painful time for us to navigate our way through. As Carl Jung says ‘LIFE IS SOME SORT OF ART and not a straight rail or ready-made product to be had at every corner.”
I refer to these hard to navigate challenging times in life as ‘funk’ and I have learnt through my own personal experience that surrender is always the ultimate healer in these situations. Surrender my friends is the way out, the ruby slippers.
It is through the act of surrender that we realize that no matter how painful it is; a miscarriage, the death of a loved one, motorbike accident, a relationship breakup, or whatever ‘funk’ we are experiencing at the time, we are going through it because of a higher purpose which will ultimately lead us to the place we are meant to be, despite what how current circumstances appear.
When I am swimming deeply in whatever ‘funk’ is currently present for me I have learnt in the value of surrender. Letting go of everything; my expectations, my disappointments, my toxic emotions.
My mantras become “Let go and Let God” and “this too shall pass”.
I say these over and over to remind myself to place all my trust in the higher purpose.
Through surrender I remember that I am experiencing all I need to at that very moment for one reason or another.
Through surrender I have learnt to trust that whatever is happening to me is for my highest good and although the situation may appear hard, tough, challenging, painful and overwhelming it is exactly where I am meant to be.
As soon as I learned to surrender to whatever I was experiencing amazing things started to occur within my life.
Firstly I had the realization that life was not ‘happening’ to me. Life was actually ‘responding’ to me.
The more energy I put into strengthening my inner core beliefs of self worth, self appreciation, self acceptance and self love the easier it became to accept that whatever was transpiring was essentially a positive thing despite appearances. I found my usually inner dialogue of negative self-talk naturally morphing into more positive and affirmative self-talk. I didn’t feel like a ‘victim’ of life or circumstance any longer. I felt like a participant and understood that I am the co-creator of my experience here on earth. As all of this lightened my heart and soul in a way that allows me to now take on every new challenge with an open mind, courage and desire to delve deep into the experience and extract whatever jewels of knowledge and teaching I can in order to grow and develop as a person.
Surrender enabled me to totally change my perception around dealing with my ‘funk’ and the more I accepted this the more I realized that Maria was right all along; “When God closes a door, somewhere he opens a window”.
So I ask you…
What do you need to surrender to in exchange for peace?
- I need to let go of the need to control other people
- I need to trust that life will deliver me exactly what I need
- I need to believe that (insert – partner, job, holiday, promotion etc.) wasn’t in my highest interests and something else amazing is coming along soon.
- I have the strength to handle all of life’s ebbs and flows with courage and grace.
- What I am experiencing will ultimately lead me to a better version of myself.
- I cant change the people around me but I can change myself
How will you remind yourself when you are deep in your ‘funk’ that everything is going to be ok?
- Use affirmations
- Surround myself with positive people
- Ask for help when I need it
- Spend time in nature
- Get friends to remind me of how awesome I am when I forget
- Have some alone time to recharge
- Spend time out of my head by getting physically active or meditating
- Practice gratitude and count all the current blessings I have in my life
How can you best support yourself during these times of ‘funk’?
- Take care of my body with healthy foods and exercise
- Rest and take time out
- Book in for a healing session of some sort
- Practice Yoga, Qi Gong or meditation
- Stay away from stimulants (especially alcohol)
- Say ‘No’ to outside demands and stressors
- Be extra gentle with yourself.
The thing is we are all going to experience ‘funk’ and ‘doors closing’ as we continue down the yellow brick road of life. Anyone who is under the influence of thinking life is all rainbows, butterflies and happy moments is delusional and in complete denial. The darkness is what makes the light shine even brighter. I love the Ralph Waldo Emerson quote; “When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.”
It’s how you operate in your own personal funk that causes you to get stuck. If you listen to the voice of fear, shame, guilt and resistance then you get stuck in amongst the weeds and challenges and life becomes difficult and hard. But if you surrender to whatever is happening around you knowing that you are experiencing what you are meant to you will get through it quicker and easier with ease and grace.
Surrender is closely followed by trust, which inevitably leads up to acceptance.
And acceptance my friends is where we’ll find the most peace no matter what is happening. It is where we remember the ‘window’ and we know that everything is going to be ok.
In Sweet Surrender,
PS. If you need help in surrendering I have created a “Surrender and Let Go” meditation that helps you in this process. Check the details out here.
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